Mommy Dearest

Okay folks. I know it’s been an unforgivably long time, but believe it or not, I’ve been super busy.

Among other things, I’ve taken on a new pupil. That makes three all together – At this rate, I might have my first full time job by the end of the year!

Okay, let me search my memory for any and all notable occurrences since my last blog…

Oh yes, there was that bowling trip. I was weirdly excited to learn that bowling is a thing in cyprus. I say “weirdly” because I despise bowling. For those of you who have not yet heard my bowling rant, here’s an abridged version: You usually go in groups so  you’ve gotta wait anywhere between 7-15 minutes for your turn (depending on how large and chatty the group is), during which time you are hosting a small internal pep rally, telling yourself  – no – convincing yourself  that THIS time, you will knock some pins over. Then, when it’s finally your turn, you march up to the ball dispenser in this odd, hyped-up, determined state, and if you’re anything like me, your ball heads straight for the gutter. Every. Time. At that point, you’ve got to turn around with a fake AF smile smacked onto your face because you know you all came here to have “fun.”

Also, I’m too weak for the heavy balls, but my fingers are too fat for the light ones.

Moving right along. My mom’s visit was wonderful, despite the metaphorical turbulence we kept hitting. First, she had to spend all day in Ben Gurion airport because she missed her flight to Cyprus because they decided to close the gate AN HOUR before take-off. Who does that? Josh and I would never make a single flight if that was standard protocol. So she booked another flight, walked around a bit, had some ice cream and when it finally came time to board – the flight was suddenly delayed. I think that’s probably about the time she started crying. What’s important is she made it to Cyprus (which is NOT in Greece by the way – we need to start dispelling that misconception) with all of my tuna cans and stella doro cookies.

That night, we had a lovely steak dinner with some friends, to whom my mom later referred as “A colorful bunch,” and the next day, we walked around the neighborhood while she took pictures of literally EVERYTHING. So I took pictures of her taking pictures.

Back at home, I kept catching her scrubbing various items around my apartment. That’s my mom for you. She and Bella were…courteous to one another, but I don’t see an epic love story happening there, especially after Bella forgot her manners and ripped mom’s panty hose. Oh boy.

Speaking of Bella, Josh and I were with her in the park, when we suddenly heard someone  calling her name. We were pretty confused since Nicosia is not the kind of place that even my celebrity husband runs into people he knows. Turns out, there’s another Bella in town. They hit it off until our Bella got a little too forward.

After a quick tour of the medical school, Josh, my mom and I flew to Israel for the weekend and had a grand ole time seeing friends and attending the Biegel-Litman wedding AKA the party of the century. The doctor-in-training left back to Cyprus on Sunday and, though the small tickle I had in my throat on Saturday night suddenly turned into a big tickle,  I ventured into the old city with my mom, who bought and ate several different sufganyot along the way. When an elderly man cursed us for not giving him money, she unleashed the Rivkie Pinsker we all know and love upon him. I don’t know if he learned his lesson, but he didn’t mess with us on our way back.

Then the big tickle turned into fever, a crippling headache, nausea, you name it, so we unfortunately spent the rest of her visit on the couch watching bad 90s movies (#crazybeautiful) and then it was bye bye mommy =(

 

Back in Cyprus, I had two days to recover before throwing Josh and ORI a surprise 80s birthday bash, which was more of a surprise for Ori then Josh, who was a little suspicious when we had a hard time keeping him out of the house and EVERYONE suddenly wanted to study with him. Regardless, it was a fun time for all, filled with beer pong, twister, dance-offs and more! Happy birthday, guys =)

I was rewarded for my efforts by being abandoned for a week while everyone studied for finals.

I’ll end there because this one’s getting kind of lengthy, but stay tuned to hear all about Cedric and Naomi’s visit and our three-week break!

And in the meantime, feel free to check out my new instagram account, TheAntiFitnessGuru, for your daily dose of encouragement to sit on your couch, eat wacky-mac and use your toes to change channels on the remote in order to avoid excessive movement.